[BLOG]: Movie Review: Prometheus

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Lonesamurai
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[BLOG]: Movie Review: Prometheus

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A team of explorers discover a clue to the origins of mankind on Earth, leading them on a journey to the darkest corners of the universe. There, they must fight a terrifying battle to save the future of the human race.

I'll admit from the start, I am disappointed...

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I would say there are spoiler alerts int his review (cos usually I care...) but this is a prequel to Alien and we all know what happens there, so I can just get on and tell you why Prometheus DIDN'T work!

Ok, the film starts with aliens, the Engineers, or Space Jockey from Alien, being left on Proto Earth (you'll read Proto a LOT in this review...) and using a whacky science experiment to unravel his DNA and seed the planet with DNA that will eventually create us... yeah yeah, both Creationism AND Evolution being wrong... This, while his friends fly away on thier massive spaceship that left him there

Cut to 2086 (pretty close to present day, that's a worry) and we meet one of the two main characters of this story finding cave paintings pointing to the LV star system we know so well from the Aliens franchise (yeah, this one being LV-223, an Engineers WMD factory planet)

Cut then, to 2093 (Christmas yay!) and we first meet the ship Prometheus, Serenity's sleeker, roided up brother! Seriously, whoever designed this ship must be a Firefly fan! The crew are all in Hypersleep and David (played by a surprisingly good Michael Fassbender) is watching over them all... Lets meet David:



Now, unlike Alien, where no one knew Ash was a synthetic with a company directive, we know from the outset that David is a robot, hell, the crew just don;t like him, even though he spent two and a half years making sure they survived hyper sleep and learning how to read alien languages and speak them... Yeah, I think I'd be thanking him, but ok...

Now Shaw (Noomi Rapace) and her, too cool to be an archeologist, boyfriend Holloway (the OC's Logan Marshall-Green) get to tell the rest of the crew what the deal is and we meet the supposedly now dead Peter Weyland (Guy Pearce), who must be the son of Alien Vs. Predators Charles Bishop Weyland (Lance Henriksen) (and yes AVP is canon folks, even if it was pants)

Let's meet Peter Weyland (Guy Pearce) so you can get an idea who the guy is...



Ok, enough buildup... They get to LV-223, they find the tunnels and severed head of an engineer and things start to go bad from there... They soon realise the planet is the engineers WMD factory and we are VERY QUICKLY introduced to a proto facehugger... Shaw gives birth to the full on proto Facehugger after Holloway is infected by David... Blah Blah Blah...

Seriously, Ridley Scott bought us the amazingly tense and properly terrifying Alien, but Prometheus just left me cold... I can't tell you how disappointed this film left me... The majority of deaths were the sort of fair you would see in a B-Movie martial arts horror film... The actual Alien based deaths where so well set up, you saw them coming... Plus these are alien creatures we know, we know a facehugger impregnates you with a forced blowjob... We know the alien queen is gonna bust out of the chest... meh, saw it all coming...

Ok, the one thing I did find myself thinking while I walked home eating my chips was HOW the Space Jockey and the Alien queen got from LV-223 TO LV-426 in Alien... It is mentioned in Prometheus that there are more than one Engineers ship... and Alien fans who have followed the books and graphic novels know that an Alien Queen, like an Ant queen will create a colony as quickly as possible... Now it makes sense to me that the Queen, or at least one of her facehugger babies found another Engineer in stasis, gave him a not so friendly tongue kiss and when he came too, took off from the planet and crash landed on LV-426 where Ripley and the crew found the eggs in the Engineer ship... Thank you Ridley Scott for tying that up, but how you did it, not so great

ok, it was flash, so I have to give it a 5 outta 10, but it disappointed me too much for higher...

so yeah, 5/10... Disappointing... :(

~Lone
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